This post is a little more personal than usual. I'll have another post out tomorrow with a summary of our regular season, right before we head into the series.
After 3 months of not playing ultimate I'm finally starting to get my feet back on the field. At the beginning of January I broke my leg in three places when two guys landed on top of me while playing ultimate inside. This left me incapable of even walking right at the start of my third season with Saucy and my doctor guessed I'd maybe start running at the beginning of April. I've tried not to dwell on it, but everyonce in awhile I find myself thinking 'Damn I sure wish I could go back to that day and not go to practice'. I spent the first month of the season crutching through the Iowa winter in a cast, then once February got here a moved into a boot. My left calf and quad had widdled down to a much smaller size than my right leg. This was frustrating to see after spending November and December lifting weights and trying to build muscle for speed for the first time in my life. Once I was no longer in the cast I could finally start doing physical therapy, which I've been going to 2-3 days a week and have to do on my own everyday. Physical therapy is incredibly boring and I can't wait for the day when I no longer have to do it religiously. Fortunately though I have a physical therapist who understands the urgency of me getting better and has pushed me hard enough so that I've improved faster than he and the orthopedist expected. Unfortunately though it's not soon enough for me, and everyday since I've been able to start walking I go and bug him asking if I can play yet.
When I was at Centex I spoke to a girl on UCLA who was in a cast due to a fracture. When I asked her what happened she seemed pretty pissed off about the situation (understandably so) and told me that she'll cut the cast off herself to play at conferences. Although that's clearly not the best decision, I definitely feel her pain in every sense of the word. I think a lot of people who play ultimate would go as far as to say their addicted to the sport. Not playing for three plus months just really, really sucks.
As the series draws nearer I see the clock ticking down, leaving less and less time for me to fully recover and play at my top capacity. I'm definitely getting there, but there's still progress to be made. Now I'm finding that the end of my recovery is becoming the hardest part in the process. One day my ankle will feel relatively normal so I'll participate the whole time at practice only to find the next day that it's sore, tired, and unstable. I'm trying to keep my body intact, my ankle not sore, build cardio back up, and regain game situation skills. Last week was a rough week for me, I tried playing at fool's fest but was too focused on the mental barrier of not re-injuring my leg to catch even the simplest of throws. Then on Thursday I had trouble walking normal and sat out at practice. This was the first time in awhile I was genuinely upset about the situation, and overall I was just really bitter. I've been very emotionally invested in every point saucy has won or lost this season and feel connected to the success our team has had. At the same time, though, I've selfishly felt jealous that I haven't directly contributed to a single assist or score to lead us to where we are - 3rd in the nation.
This is where I was last week. Pissed off. The last few days though have been the best I've felt since before the break. On Tuesday I practiced the whole time without pain and threw my first perfect throw outside in a game situation since November. It felt so damn good. Although I still have a ways to go with regaining execution and fitness, I'm feeling optimistic now. Last night I was talking to Justine about how happy I was things were finally starting to feel right again. I told her that I felt like I willed it to happen just in time, she responded with "I think we all did". I definitely think she's right. If I didn't feel such a commitment and love for our team I wouldn't have worked as hard as I did to get better. Although it's been a rough few months, and at times I'd get sick of hearing people ask me "how much longer" I've always appreciated that I've been missed. So thank you all for getting me to where I am now, I'm so excited to be playing with you guys again.
-Alyx aka Boot
I know exactly how you feel. I had reconstructive foot surgery on August 2 and was on crutches until Thanksgiving and in the boot until Christmas. My right calf muscle looked SO emaciated. Its taken me a long time to recover and the last game Centex was the first time where I felt able to play Ultimate again. Stick with the recovery! Don't push it in Conferences or Regionals - you guys will get to Nationals. You want to be able to play in that tournament if that is the only tournament you will play in. Keep up the determination - it definitely helps. Good luck in the recovery - hope to see you on the field!
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